 (Nick Galifianakis for The Post) | Adapted from an online discussion. Dear Carolyn: You advised a reader recently that it's okay for us not to have gratitude at a bad time and I want to respectfully disagree. Did you read "The Real Miami" by Udonis Haslem? I get that we should lighten up on ourselves in every way possible and I completely agree with that. I get that gratitude shouldn't be just another obligation we're expected to meet. However, I truly believe that if we see just how awful things are for others, we cannot help but feel gratitude for our own circumstances. And, once our eyes are opened, doesn't it alleviate just a wee bit of the stress? I'm a single grandmother with a full-time essential job, and a commute, with two grandchildren living with me for whom I also had to be a schoolteacher. I could have let that get to me. And sometimes I did — but OMG. They had food to eat. And so did I. They had a safe home. And so did I. We lived in a safe neighborhood. I could pay the mortgage. I was beyond stressed out, just like everyone else I know. But yes, I had gratitude to spare. — Grateful | 
