 (Nick Galifianakis for The Post) | Adapted from an online discussion. Hi Carolyn: Two years ago, my husband passed away while my stepdaughter was in her sophomore year of college. My husband and I had very different views on careers — I went to college and have done extensive training for mine and I love it (it is also well-paying, but that's not why I do it). It fulfills me. He didn't go to college and ended up working an array of jobs that paid the bills but didn't satisfy him at all. At the end of his life, he was suffering a pretty major crisis of confidence in his career after being laid off. My stepdaughter was aware he wasn't working, but didn't know the details. She started majoring in a field that she doesn't love but would pay the bills, because that is what her dad would want her to do (he was pretty clear about that, much to my chagrin. I only found out she wasn't happy in it after he died). She has clear skills and passion in another field, which is stable, but not as lucrative. She isn't one to care about money — she's super frugal. Anyway, I've implored her to consider doing what she loves. I know she wants to change but she says she hears her dad's voice in her head telling her to do what he wanted and so she pulls back. I can't seem to let this go. Do I tell her how miserable and wrong he was in his thinking? Do I just leave it alone and let her push through this? It isn't too late to change, and paying for more college is something we, as a family, can afford (I've told her this). I feel like I'm fighting a ghost and he's not fighting fair. — Fighting a Ghost | 
