 (Nick Galifianakis for The Post) | Adapted from an online discussion. Hi Carolyn: I have a longtime friend who is driven, educated and caring. A few years ago she started dating her boyfriend, a sometimes-musician who works minimally. She moved him in when he was "between apartments" and he's lived there ever since. Now, this guy is perfectly nice, loyal and she enjoys his company, but he contributes maybe 5 percent max to their shared expenses. Maybe it's mean, but I've sort of rationalized this as her choosing to have a pet: perfectly enjoyable company, but doesn't contribute. She says she is happy, but my concerns are: 1. She praises him with statements like, "He's so thoughtful; I got home from work late the other night and started cleaning the bathroom, and he told me, 'You're tired, just leave that until the morning and relax tonight.'" Yes, instead of making any move to clean the bathroom himself that he'd been sitting around using all week. 2. She says they want kids one day. I can't help but think how much they'll miss these past years' worth of potential dual income when that time comes. I feel like you're going to tell me to just stay out of it … which I'm prepared to hear. But is there any way this is a legitimate, healthy situation, just unconventional? Or am I right to want better for her? And what can I even say at this point? — Friend | 
